Archive | April, 2009

Niece’s Quinceanera

19 Apr

Niece’s Quinceanera, originally uploaded by pharoe14.

Today was my Niece’s Quinceanera. This is my 4th niece to go through her Quince, and it ALWAYS amazes me how grown up they suddenly look on their day with their fancy dress and makeup. She looked beautiful, but most importantly she looked really happy. Oh, I better get back to the party!

First Photo with New Camera

15 Apr

First Photo with New Camera, originally uploaded by pharoe14.

So I broke down and bought an SLR digital camera. A very nice man was selling it out of Kailua. And I must say it has made me feel incredibly happy. I just wish there were someone who could teach me how to use it properly.

Anyway, I tool this over exposed picture hoping it would turn out nice as a b&w

Weird spending week

14 Apr

This week started out with me looking to buy a new car. That changed into getting my current car fixed. While getting my car dropped off I fell in love with a used car, dirt cheap. I committed to it and was now trying to get the cash I needed to buy it. But then I got a call telling me they had to give the car to someone who they owed money to. So nothing new. Except now I got an eye on a very expensive camera. All the span of a day. I feel like buying things are the cornerstones of my weekly activities. Sad. Very sad. But fun.

Parents Split Up

9 Apr

You know, at my ripe old age I didn’t think about this. So my mom moved in with my brother because her and my dad are not getting along. They’re all on Maui. I realized today that I hadn’t spoken to my dad in about two weeks because I usually call my mom’s cell phone and he’d be right there. Now I have to make attempts to call to just “shoot the breeze” with two different parents, not a parental unit.

And when I come over, who do I stay with? My dad is all alone in his house…but there’s a reason he’s alone. He can be grouchy and overbearing, while my mom feeds me and lets me watch as much tv as I want (what am I? 12 years old?).

I’m not choosing sides. I am closest to my mom, but since mom was always next to dad it’s not like it was a big difference.

I’m talking in circles. Mostly because I don’t want to tackle the idea that either one of them will be alone. My mom will always be able to count with her children though and my dad would rather have his foot cut off than live in someone else’s house. I’m scared he will go back to Mexico to his house over there, saying he has nothing here. I’m afraid he’ll miss my niece’s baby, his great grand daughter or son. He will miss my graduation.

I don’t know how to help him without sacrificing my own life. I guess a good start would be to make sure I call him regularly, the way I do with mom.

Missing the Stage

7 Apr
Doing My Thing

Doing My Thing

You know, there’s really very few things that are as rewarding as performing on stage.  Take this from someone who works in a helping profession and loves it.  However, performing on stage brings out primal fears, and really, weather it’s your voice, your acting, or your playing an instrument, you really offer something that you personally have worked very hard on.  Regardless of how many people helped you to get up it, essentially it’s just YOU up there.  And so you get the applause and you get the boos. 

I might be doing a performance on Thursday, just singing.  I have been trying to stay away from doing anything performance wise, be it theatre or singing, because the preparation takes so much time.  But I must say, I do miss it.  I miss it a great deal. 

Sometimes I feel that the more I’m away from the stage the less people will want me back.  I’m thinking of auditioning for a show but I’m actually scared of not getting cast, which hasn’t happened before, but there’s always a first.  I think your confidence is what comes off clearly in auditions and I just don’t have that right now.

Anyway, this is a meaningless post, but if there are some of you out there who have performed on stage and feel like it’s time to go back, I’d love to hear your fears/hesitations/exceitement.